PRESENT: P.L, D.F, P.B, M.S, T.M, B.D, A.B-W, M.M, D.G-M, J.G, G.A, P.F, F.B, C.M, M.C.

RESULTS: There was only one 2, posted by Monty on the 17th. He received a fistful of cash which included rollovers. Today’s Comp was threesomes where the best two scores on each hole were counted. D’soD were Bumpers, Kwok and Winscales with a derisory 61 points. They will each receive a one shot lift. DD’soD were the Rabbi, Laird and Crocs with 69 points. Runners up were Shagpile, 2Beers and Shotgun with 72 points. The worthy winners with an immense 74 points were the Geezer, Wellen and Herbie. Each will be pulled by one shot. Brains is on a well deserved holiday and is obviously exempt from MOHGS duties, therefore those members who have been pulled or gained extra shots will not be notified until he is officially back to modify the table.

The Laird, graciously handed over the previous week’s winnings to Kwok and Bumpers.

TOASTS: Both David Grosch-Miller and Alan Beaumont-Whigham warmly commended Dina Asher-Smith who was narrowly pipped at the post by Shelly-Ann Frazier-Price at the IAAF meeting in Doha and thus became the first British woman to medal in an international-sprint.

TOASTS:

To Shotgun who was a member of the winning team in the recent Autumn Leaves Comp. The Laird was a member of the team which was runner up.

To the Geezer, who recently became a G/dad to new born baby Jack. The Geezer referred to the new born as ‘ wor Jack, ‘ and was gently teased by Herbie for incorrect use of the vernacular. This resulted in a howl of protests from the indigenous members who applauded the erstwhile cockney for his choice of language.

LAST WEEKS MINUTES WERE ACCEPTED IN THEIR ENTIRETY.

MATTERS ARISING: The Chair was back in his rightful spot at the head of the table, looking sharp and fit after his trip down the Swannee River. He began proceedings by requesting that all members continue to be flexible, adaptable and light on their feet like ‘ dancing queens.’ He was also perplexed about the fact that the meeting last week had voted that in future two two balls should replace a final 4 ball in order to speed up the game. However he agreed that we must sail with the wind, continue to evolve and be mindful of prevailing conditions when making judgments.

BUSINESS:

*Bumpers questioned the Comp. Sec about today’s competition and why the format had been changed at the last minute. He was referred back to the Chairs opening statement about flexibility. The late arrival of one member had necessitated changes to be made quickly and the Comp. Sec. was forced to make decisions on the hoof.

*The Chair reminded all participants to arrive promptly at 8.15 for the draw at 8.30. He then proposed a toast to the beleaguered tosser who continues unfailingly to fulfil a thankless task in often trying circumstances.

*The Honourable Member for Toxteth reported that he was made aware of grumblings from dissatisfied club members about the block booking by MOHGS on Monday mornings. The GC manager had been approached by the aforementioned malcontents and rumour has it that he is considering the cancellation of the of the block booking in the near future.

FINANCE: The Chancellor, accompanied by his burgeoning box of cash, issued his Autumn Statement. He announced that due to fewer away days and no weekend retreats, his box was now overflowing and he was considering employing Securicor to accompany him to meetings to ensure the integrity of the box. The total at his disposal has now reached the dizzy heights of £320. The members were stunned into silence by this fiscal revelation. Crocs was first off the mark to thank the Hon. Fin. Sec. for his stringent stewardship of the cash as well as his continued diligence and professionalism.

# Shagpile revealed that he will attend Foxton GC this week and attempt to negotiate a good deal for an overnighter. A straw poll revealed that many MOHGS would be interested.

# The Laird, Herbie, the Chair and the Cardinal offered their apologies for absence next Monday.

The meeting was brought to a satisfactory conclusion at 1.20pm.

Burt Kwok.