All the combatants arrived promptly on Sunday with the weather Gods smiling. The sun shone brightly there was little wind so the scene was set for a festival of golf. The buggies were lined up ready for action and the competition began. The Laird distributed the scorecards and extracted fees from each player. His organisation throughout was impeccable and has set the bar at an extraordinarily high level.

The Rabbi agreed to Chair both meetings due to the enforced absence of the Chair.

RESULTS: The first game of the weekend extravaganza was a singles competition for the much coveted Hunley Hall trophy. The D’soD were the unfortunate Shotgun and Prof with 20 points apiece. DD’soD were Kwok and Dewey with a miserable 26 points apiece. The runner up was Crocs with a more presentable score of 35 points. The winner with a very creditable 36 points and the trophy winner was the redoubtable and determined Rabbi. No 2’s were posted. The trophy was presented by last year’s winner, Crocs, who confessed that there was superficial damage to the magnificent prize which had been inflicted, accidentally by his mission controller during a frenzied cleaning campaign. The Rabbi graciously accepted his prize and admitted that his round had not been completely trouble free, in that he had visited most bunkers on the course. The Cardinal and Laird were the recipients of the mystery pairs Comp.

The Laird announced that the h/caps would be readjusted overnight to reflect today’s results.

Shotgun proposed that the Laird was the best under secretary for competitions that we have ever had. The Scuttler, resplendent in high viz yellow, seconded the proposal which was universally agreed.

TOASTS: To the Prof, who won last week’s Seniors Comp, by a country mile.

To Jock St. Rappe who was unfortunately absent with back problems.

Condolences were expressed for newly relegated Hull City FC.

The meeting closed in good spirits at 6.20.

The revellers imbibed several well deserved pints before changing for the evening meal prior to embarking on more chicanery and entertainment.

After the meal, Crocs whipped out his banjo and proceeded to rock the joint with his well chosen repertoire of ballads. He was ably abetted by the boys who sang with gusto and provided other guests and bar staff with free entertainment.

Kwok provided a quiz which was won by the Prof.

SUNDAY: The Comp was 4 BBB and the Laird who had worked tirelessly throughout the night, presented each group with scorecards and set the days session in motion. It must be stated that the weather had turned nasty with gale force winds and showers. However this did not dent the enthusiasm at this point and the boys set about their tasks with naive gusto, like lambs to the slaughter. The course was at its most challenging which was reflected in the scores.

RESULTS: DoD were Rabbi and Kwok with a miserable 29 points. DDoD were the Cardinal and Laird with 32 points. Prof and Crocs were the runners up with 35 points. The winners were the popular pairing of Dewey and Shotgun with 36 points. Mystery prizes were awarded to Scuttler, Kwok, Brains, Winker and the Laird/Cardinal.
Toasts were proposed to the Laird and Brains, who together have consolidated and promoted the Hunley experience to the great benefit and delight of all the participants.
Brains agreed to update the h/cap board.

POST-MORTEM: Everyone appears to have had a good time, however it was felt that standards had fallen in regards to the catering at Hunley. Breakfast was now a serve yourself buffet which in past years had been served individually to each guest. It was thought that the price of the weekend had risen by 20 per cent but the service had reduced by a similar proportion. Some people also considered that the evening meal was not as good as previous years.

Dewey commented that the course was in pristine condition.

Most people agreed that the buggies were a godsend, especially on day two.
There was a general discussion about possible venues for other away days, before the meeting began to fragment and the Rabbi called time gentlemen please. The weary yet invigorated revellers began to leave the venue to return to familiar haunts.

Dewey has not been receiving emails and requested to be put on the list at —dewison@btinternet.com.

BURT KWOK.

PRESENT: B.Y, T.M, T.H, A.B-W, C.M, J.G, P.F, D.F, P.L, D.G-W.

Due to the absence of the proper Chairman, the meeting was chaired by his able and trusty lieutenant, the Rabbi.

RESULTS: The results were declared by the under secretary for competitions, the Laird, who in the absence of his boss has gained at least six inches in height, a jauntiness in his step and the focussed aggression of a lion on heat. There were four 2’s posted by Kwok, Rabbi, Laird and 2 Beers who shared a rollover pot of which a portion is still in the safekeeping of the Cardinal. DoD was the unfortunate Rabbi with a score of 28 points. There was some consternation that he had deliberately choked in order to increase his h/cap for the forthcoming Hunley trip, however under intense scrutiny it was revealed by his playing companions that he actually was crap. DD’soD were Brains and the Geezer with 29 points apiece. The runner up was the Prof with 35 points. The outright winner with a magnificent 43 unassailable points was 2 Beers.

The cards were collected by Crocs, who in tandem with Jocks, is attempting to update the results spreadsheet. They should be applauded for their endeavours, as the sheet gives an excellent overview of the data and the progress or lack of for each member over an extended period.

FINANCES: Geezers cards—–£2.80. Swears—-£3.30.

LAST WEEKS MINUTES WERE ACCEPTED IN THEIR ENTIRETY.

TOASTS: To the Toon who became champs of the Championship.

To 2 Beers and Johnny Crispy who won last week’s Seniors and to Kwok and the Prof who were third in the same event.

HUNLEY HALL: The rules and regs for the weekend were revealed by the Laird, who had also produced a printout of the agenda. On Sunday there will be a singles Comp for the Hunley Hall trophy. Monday will be a 4BBB Comp. The full text will be available for perusal at the venue and includes groupings for the singles and BB comps as well as the  divisions of prize money. All decisions of the assistant Comp Sec are sacrosanct and members beware that there will be zero tolerance of any form of intransigence.

Brains reminded the group that the first tee off time on Sunday is 1.15. On Monday the first tee off is at 10.15. It was decided that dinner will be taken at 7.30. Buggies will be available on both days. There was a huge vote of thanks for Brains for organising the event and to the Laird for organising the order of play.

* There was a disappointing turnout of MOHGS for the Lifeboat appeal at Newbiggin on Friday, when only 2 members attended.

* The members who are definitely attending the Bamburgh game on 22 May are: Rabbi, Prof, Kwok, Brains, Cardinal, Jocks, Crocs, Shotgun and Straggler. The Geezer agreed to be first reserve. The Laird unfortunately will be in Lanzarote, therefore the Straggler who had agreed to be first reserve, will be called upon to play.

AOB: Due to the Scuttlers sartorial elegance at last week’s game it was suggested that he be given a new nickname of High Viz. However no decision can be taken until the AGM therefore the Scuttler can breathe easy pro tem.

The meeting closed at 1.20.

Burty Kwok.

Note: Present – RH, CM, DG-M, BY, JG, TH, PL, DF, GW, FB, CC.

Results:-  Duffer of the Day – The Laird (24 points)

Deputy Duffer of the Day – The Prof (29 points)

Runner up – The Rabbi – (35 points and £3.50p)

Champion – The Scuttler (42 points and £7.50p)

There were no 2s, swears raised £2, Geezer cards £3.80 and The Chair generously donated 50p for not having any MOGHS  apparel on on this the first Monday of the month.

Matters discussed:- Last week’s minutes were accepted and no matters arose.   It was agreed that white tees would not be used on Bank Holidays and there was enthusiasm with regard to the possibility of an away-day at Burgham in September which has been researched by Windscale.

Next week’s tee-off times:- 8.48, 8.56, 9.04.

The meeting closed at 1.02pm.

PRESENT: F.B, G.W, P.L, J.G, P.F, P.B, G.A, C.D, C.M.

Only 9 members were present today therefore the game was singles played in groups of three.

APOLS: Jock St. Rappe who it was reported was feeling rather fragile.

RESULTS: The Chair was required to sort out the results as well as Chair the meeting, which is a sizeable task and worthy of respect.

DoD was Brains with a score of 26 points. DDoD was the poor frazzled Chair with 29 points. The runners up with 35 points apiece were Crocs, El Mat and Winscales. The overall winner with a very creditable 37 points was the redoubtable Dewy.

FINANCE: Geezers Cards—£2.40. 2’s—£1.80. Swears—£1.60.

TOASTS: To Dewy and the Geezer for a masterful performance in winning the Seniors Texas Scramble last week.

LAST WEEKS MINUTES WERE ACCEPTED.

MATTERS ARISING: It was noted that the Geezer is currently in receipt of last week’s takings. The Chair admitted to owing the Geezer 30 bob which he promised to repay upon demand.

* There appears to be at least 2 vacancies for the game at Newbiggin tomorrow. The Rabbi is unable to play because he is attending a funeral. If there are any takers please contact Shagpile asap.

* The Chair will take orders for new attire, the week after next.

* A gentle reminder that the trip to Hunley Hall is fast approaching. The first tee off will be at 1pm on Sunday 14 May.

* The Chair has given a modicum of thought to organising a Summer Party, which he has tentatively dubbed “Midsummer Madness,” and would include party games plus a curry in the clubhouse. Any further thoughts on the format would be warmly received. Upon further thought he considered the title “Curry and Frolics,” might be more appropriate.

* The away day to Bamburgh will be on Monday 22 May.

* The Chair appealed for ideas for away days to be discussed at the next meeting.

* The Chair, wearing the Comp. Sec. hat, decreed that out of bounds on the 18th, shall be demarcated by the white poles. Balls which travel beyond the poles will be deemed out of play.

The Rabbi has booked 4 tees for next week which is a Bank Holiday. Tee times are 8.40, 8.48, 8.56 and 9.04.

There being no further business, the meeting concluded at 1.10pm.

BURT.

Results.            No 2’s posted £2 c/f ( In safe hands of The Geezer, I think)

DOD         El Matador with derisory(post night on the drink) 22pts

DDoD       The Geezer & The Laird 28pts

2nd           Blue Watch 38pts (£3.00)

1st            The Prof  42pts (£7.00)

Rest of results:   Dewy 34pts, Brains 34pts, Jock St Rappe 32pts, Rabbi 31pts, Crocs 37pts.

Present. RH,SH,RY,CD,CM,JG,PL,GW,TM,DF

It was nice to have Blue Watch back in the fold. Hopefully he will be able to return again soon.

The meeting was chaired in rotation by Geezer, Brains, Dewy, Rabbi,Prof, El Matador & Blue Watch.

Toasts. To Prof & Laird for winning the Seniors Comp last Wed with a very impressive 50 pts. Keeping up the MOHGS reputation in this event.

To the Seniors and the Club Captains for their respective Holes In One at the Seniors  comp last  wed. and in the  Snr friendly via Seahouse on Thurs.

Mins     Accepted

Matters arising  Nil

AOB     Hunly Hall    A few payments were made to Brains.

The Geezer was concerned that the normal format of knowledge of pairings would not be continued at this years event due to the changes that have been made to the Comp. Secs. He was gently put in his place by the Best Assistant Comp Clerk the MOHGS have ever had, to date, and informed that all will be revealed in due course and not to worry himself, even though he wasn’t attending.

MOHGS playing off the wrong handicap. There was a brief debate on this subject and the consensus was that it was the responsibility of the player to play to his current handicap. There was suggestion made that any mistakes should be punished by either a monitory fine or deduction in handicap. It was decided that this would be discussed at a later date.

The Assistant Comp Clerk assured those present that he would be checking handicaps thoroughly each week.

Apologies for next Mon from Geezer and probably Prof & Laird. The latter 2 were in the pot for the Seniors friendly at Ponteland.

Meeting closed at 1.10pm

Apologies from all those not here.

Present:- PB, CM,FB, DF,PL,TH,MM,CD,GW,LW,TM, KS (meeting only)

Competition Results;

One two posted by the ever popular Chair, who pocketed £2.20

Duffer of the Day was Scuttler with a derisory 22 points. Deputy Duffer was Johnnie Walker with 26 points.

In second place was The Chair with 36 points and £3 better off, however the winners for the week were the returning Matador and the previously underperforming Cardinal with 39 points, both are now £4 better off. A poor return for such sparkling scoring!

Handicaps to be adjusted as per the rules of MOHGS.

Geezers Cards were in play and returned £2.20

Swears made £2.80 thanks mainly to The Scuttler and Johnnie.

Toasts:

To Sergio Garcia for belatedly picking up the US Masters.

Justin Rose for a gallant second place.

Jock Strap for a quick recovery to mobility.

Previous minutes were agreed as a correct record.

Matters Arising

There appeared to be some confusion over the handicap data, however the Competition Secretary announced that his decision was final and so the matter of his handicap was swept under the carpet.

AOB

In the MOHGS tradition of consideration to all other players it was agree to book only two slots for next Monday as it happens to be Easter Monday and a number of MOHGS are otherwise engaged on family duties.

Shagpile announced that there was one Texas Scramble Team available for Newbiggin on 25 April. Tee time 9.16. The Cardinal and Matador stepped into the vacancy but two more players are urgently required. Please let Shaggers know by next Monday.

Similarly there are places available for 5 May again at Newbiggin, please let Shaggers know by next Monday. Same tee times available.

The meeting closed at 1.30pm.

PRESENT: F.B, K.S(n/p), B.H, J.G, D.F, C.M, P.F, A. B- W, T.H, B.Y, P.B, M.M, P.L.

Today saw the welcome return from his holiday of the Chair as well as his trusty sidekick, who has sadly been under the weather of late, the President.

RESULTS: Today’s fixture was a 4BBB. There was one 2 posted by team Crocjock who pouched today’s kitty plus £2.60 rollover from last week. DoD were the aforementioned team Crocjock with a miserable haul of 37 points. DDoD were team Scutlaird with 40 points. Runners up were teams Brainsraggler, Shotkwok and Shagprof with 44 points apiece. The winners with a staggering 48 points were team Rabbicardnal.

FINANCES: The Chair enquired as to the amount of subsidy on offer to the Hunley mob from the pot. He was quietly but firmly assured that the Fin. Sec. had yet to decide the full amount, but that it would no doubt be substantial. There was a total of £2.70 in swears.

GEEZERS CARDS: B.Y(40p), A.B-W(60p), J.G(20p), P.L(20p), D.F(20p), C.M(20p), P.F(20p), M.M(40p), B.H(60p)——–£3.00.

TOASTS: To the team of Jocks-Kwok-Scuttler who valiantly won last week’s Seniors Comp. Kwok was further praised by the Scuttler for his astute captaincy of the team.

The Chair praised Brains, Kwok and the Laird for their unstinting efforts in keeping the society on an even keel during his absence.

To Dame Vera Lynn who turns 100 years old today.

LAST WEEKS MINUTES WERE ACCEPTED IN THEIR ENTIRETY.

AOB: The Chair, who had plenty of time to ponder whilst in holiday queues, announced that he was considering a root and branch reform of the entrance fees for the Monday comps. He went on to explain in minute detail how his master plan involved a convoluted payment of fees commensurate with individual h/caps. His plan also included reform of the 2’s pot. He found an enthusiastic seconded for his proposal, in the shape of the Laird but unfortunately the proposal was overwhelmingly rejected by the membership.

*. The Chair had kept abreast of the MOHGS news whilst on holiday via his uncanny mastery of the blogosphere and he remarked that the pairing of Brains and Laird had performed so cannily in delivering the results, that he wondered if they might wish to continue and take over the role on a permanent basis. The pairing remarked that even though they were flattered by his pronouncements, they preferred to keep their powder dry, but would take the tiller if and when the Chair were absent and unable to perform his duties.

* St. Rappe reminded the gathering that the Beamish game had been booked for a 10 o’ clock ko on 26 June. Several members have contacted him to signify their intentions but there may be others who wish to play but have not been in touch. Please contact the Strap asap. He also requested nominations for Captain of the day. There was overwhelming support for Kwok, no doubt prompted by his understated performance in last week’s Seniors Comp, when he effortlessly steered the winning team to victory using the carrot and stick approach. Kwok hesitantly agreed to accede to this huge honour bestowed upon him and pledged to devise suitable tactics to ensure a valiant victory for the team.

* The Chair was mindful that the Society was growing at a rate of knots and would soon possibly need 5 or more tee times on Mondays. He was aware that in booking so many tees, we were delaying the groups which historically have followed us, namely the Whitley Bay boys. However it was acknowledged that there was no easy answer and it was an unfortunate case of devil takes the hindmost.

* An extra toast was proposed for the President as he made his excuses and left the meeting.

* The Rabbi has booked 3 tee times for next week, 8.48, 56 and 9.04.

* The Prof, ever on the ball, reminded everyone that the clocks go forward next Sunday.

There being no further business, the meeting closed at 1.05pm.

Kwok.

PRESENT: A.B-W, F.B, D.F, P.F, P.L, T.H, C.M, M.C, B.Y, P.B, B.H, J.G.

RESULTS: A staggering 5×2’s were posted. The winning couples decided en masse to donate the winnings into the box, or as it is now known as, —-the Hunley Hall fund. The DoD’s were the unfortunate team of Straglaird with a miserly 41 points. DDoD’s were team Scutcroc with 43 points. Runners up were team Cardstrap with 46 points. The joint winners were the ever popular Brainsprof and Shotbump with a magnificent 47 points apiece.

FINANCES: The Geezers cards realised a total of £2. Swears realised £2.50.

TOASTS: To the policeman and civilians who were killed and maimed in the recent terrorist attack in London.

LAST WEEKS MINUTES WERE ACCEPTED IN THEIR ENTIRETY.

* The Laird spoke about the Bamburgh trip in place of Shagpile who is on holiday. He reported that the following members are interested in playing on 22nd of May.————Prof, Brains, Crocs, Rabbi, Laird, Cardinal, Kwok, Strap and Shotgun. The Chair would make up the numbers if called upon. The cost per punter would be £10/head. Shagpile and 2 of his marrows will also be playing.

* Brains observed that the Geezers double bogie card, disadvantaged the high h/cappers. He did not receive much sympathy save for a nod from the Strap.

* There was a heated debate about putting and chipping and Geezers cards and anomalies and on green, off green shots, which amounted to a lot of sabre rattling and raised hackles but no immediate resolution. The status quo was established whereby if the first putt is off the green, it does not actually count as a putt in terms of the GC’s.

* Crocs announced that next week heralds the start of comprehensive work on the greens, which may delay or impede the games. He suggested that it may be wise to look for a game elsewhere. There was little enthusiasm from the membership so he just shrugged his manly shoulders (honed by many hours of intense labour on his allotment), and the meeting continued.

* The Jockster revealed that the Dirty Dozen, may not actually amount to a dozen and that some MOHGS may be conscripted onto their side to make up the numbers.

* The Cardinal apologised for his absence next week, since he will be playing with his other friends instead. Kwok will also be absent for several weeks at her Majesty’s pleasure whilst on Jury Service.

* The Rabbi has booked 4 tee times for next week at the usual times.

There being no further business, the meeting closed at 1.10pm.

Burt.

Present: F.B, D.F, P.L, A.L, C.V, C.M, L.W, J.G, B.Y, T.H, B.H, M.M.

(The President turned up for the meeting looking quite chipper).

Results: One 2 posted by Team Scut/Chair.

The DoDs were the team Prof/Pile with 39 points.

DDOD were the Team Johnnie/Laird and Rab/Strappe

Runners—up with 43 points were the Team Croc/Brains and joint winners were the teams Big/Dewy and Scut/Chair with a credible 44 points.

Finances: Geezer’s cards = £2.60p and swears = £2.40p.

(Both pots pocketed by the ever-trustworthy Chair).

Toasts:  To Johanna Konta for winning the Indian Wells Tennis Championship and Jock Strappe belatedly for his 71^st birthday on April Fools Day!

Last week’s minutes were accepted and no matters arose.

The meeting unanimously agreed that the nickname ‘Crispy’ was inappropriate and henceforth Mr Walker would be known as ‘Johnnie’ in keeping with family tradition and MOHGS custom.

Tee-times for next week 8.40, 8.48, 8.56 and 9.04.

With no other matters of substance to discuss the meeting closed at 13.15.

PRESENT: M.M, J.G, P.B, B.H, P.F, D.F, B.Y, C.M.

A beautiful day at the Bridle Path, with the boys anticipating excitement and adventure.

RESULTS: It was decided by the temporary replacement Comp. Sec. that today’s game would be 4BBB. The were 2×2’s posted by team Crocs and team Gibbo who shared a pot which included the £2.60 carry over from last week. The DoD’s were Kwok and the Prof with a meagre and derisory 38 points. DDoD’s were the Laird and Crocs with 39 points. Runners up with 44 points were Brains and Jocks. The winners with a commendable score of 45 points were Shagpile and the Cardinal. The winners will be pulled one shot whilst the duffers will each gain a shot.

FINANCES: There was no penalty for swearing today, therefore the kitty suffered whilst the air around the course turned a very dark shade of blue. P.F, C .M and P.B were penalised 50p apiece for not wearing regulation gear, although it has to be said that the Cardinal looked rather fetching in his Morpeth jacket.

CONCLUSION: The fare in the clubhouse was excellent and certainly hit the spot. The comrades chewed the cud as well as the bacon sarnies and passed a whimsical hour. Thanks were expressed to Crocs for organising the event, which is now in its third successful year of operation. Crocs, the wily old operator, merely shrugged his shoulders in a mixture of embarrassment and satisfaction at a job well and truly done.

The Laird is also due respect and gratitude for grasping the nettle and taking over the decision making due to the absence of you know who. It was agreed that the mornings efforts had proved very fulfilling with ideal weather a good course and good natured banter.

Bur T. Kwok.

Ps. John, will you please send this to the others once you have posted today’s results?