PRESENT: P.F, T.H, T.M, C.M, P.L, M.M, P.B, B.D, M.S, C.D, B.H, D.G-M, D.F, G.A,

There was an extremely warm atmosphere as always at the NEWBIGGIN course led by the affable and competent master of ceremonies, Shagpile. With bacon butties and coffee at the ready, he outlined the day’s event, a singles Comp played off club h/caps in two groups of 3 and two groups of 4.

The scene was set for a cordial game with a butterfly display thrown in to boot. The weather was fine which was a first for NEWBIGGIN, in that there was absolutely no wind and none of the dreaded rain which has plagued us in the past. It was also worth noting that there was a welcome re-appearance from the elusive Jock Strap who is fighting fit and enthusiastic as ever.

RESULTS: As the game was played off club h/caps, the results had no bearing on MOHGS rankings. There were 2 worthy winners, each with a stupendous 39 points, the Rabbi and Crocs. The runner up with 36 points and a share of the pot was the eagle eyed and indefatigable Scuttler. Only one 2 was posted by the joint-winner, Crocs.

The results were announced by Shagpile who was graciously thanked for organising the event on behalf of the group by the punctilious Laird.

Burt E. Kwok.

Apologies from all those not here.

Present:- PB, CD, FB, PL, LW, ABW, JG, GW(left early), KS, DF, DGM, MS(left early), CM, TM, MM, TH, BD,

Competition Results;

Played by seventeen hardy MOHGS for the Championship Trophy. Conditions were challenging with a very strong south westerly gale, despite this, scoring for many was acceptable.

Three twos today, two for the Laird at the fourth and eighth, and for Two Beers at the fourth. The pot of £3.40 was shared accordingly.

Duffer of the Day was Wellen with 22 miserly points, it was suggested that he was trying to improve his chances of winning the Championship until he realised it was today!

Deputy Duffer was El Matador with 24 points

Runners up with 35 points was Dewey and Two Beers who received £3.50 each

However the Champion Golfer of the year was The Laird with 38 points and another £10 to the coffers. Kerching indeed!

Handicaps will be adjusted accordingly.

Swears gleaned £3.60 from last week and £7.80 today, a reflection of the unhelpful weather conditions I suspect.

Toasts

Shane Lowry for becoming the Open Champion yesterday at Royal Portrush.

Previous minutes were agreed.

Matters Arising

The Chairman advised that MOHGS have a website, MOHGS.com which is a source of useful information and kept up to date by Lord Snooty.

The Laird is arranging a return match against Hobson at Morpeth, suggested dates are 16 or 23 September. Please let the Laird know your availability.

Thanks to Shagpile for hosting last Monday’s game and drinks. The Chairman was a little shamefaced at not toasting the American guests last Monday. However he overcame that with his usual aplomb.

Next Monday the course will be closed to us, various options were suggested but Shagpile was on the ball and the phone to arrange a game at Newbiggin. Bacon sarnie at 8.45 am (Dickhead Geezer) and first tee at 9.30am, all for an amazing price of £13. Ten MOHGS present would attend, any more please let Shagpile know asap.

AOB

Crocs was concerned about all the MOHGS Trophies and suggested an audit of whereabouts. Brains settled the issue with his usual fortitude and advised that only one remained to be contested, that being the Christmas Trophy.

Mention of Christmas immediately turned The Cardinal’s thoughts to a MOHGS Party. The Chair raised the spectre of a game of golf, a few drinks in the clubhouse and a curry in Morpeth. What would Marley make of that idea again?

Meeting closed at 1.30pm

Today’s game was ostensibly to celebrate the birthday of Shagpile who had kindly placed a tidy sum of cash behind the bar as well as provide a substantial trophy for the eventual winner. The participants were not only MOHGS, but also an assortment of his friends from both here and abroad–mainly America. The game was played off club h/caps, therefore the result had no bearing on the MOHGS rankings.

RESULTS: The competition was won by D.Segal with 42 points. B.Kwok was second with 39 points. There were four 2’s posted by Kwok, Scuttler, Dick and Harry. Shagpile presented the prizes, £11 for first place and £10 for second with £1.50 for each of the 2’s. Crocs collected £5.90 in swears. Shagpile then awarded the trophy to the worthy winner and invited everyone to help themselves to drinks from the bar.

The President offered thanks to Shagpile and led the group in a rousing rendition of Happy Birthday to You. He then proposed a toast to the victorious England cricket team after their amazing exploits in winning the World Cup.

Shotgun proposed a toast to the US contingent and thanked them for their participation in today’s event.

The meeting closed in good spirits at 1.45.

B.Kwok.

Apologies from all those not here.

Present:- PB, CD, FB, PL, CC, LW, ABW, JG, GW, KS and BH for the meeting only.

Competition Results;

Played by nine MOHGS several others were playing for the Seniors team against Matfen.

Singles competition today.

No twos at all so £1.80 carried forward to next week.

Duffer of the Day was Dewey with 28 points.

Deputy Duffers were The Chair and El Matador with 30 points

Runner up with 36 points was The Cardinal

However the outright champ was Johnnie with a magnificent 43 points.

Handicaps will be adjusted accordingly.

Swears gleaned £3.60

Toasts

None

Previous minutes were agreed.

Matters Arising

The Chairman asked if MOHGS would like to play against Hobson at home sometime this summer. An affirmative response was provided.

Woll is apparently dead in the water, or is it???

The meeting descended somewhat with the participants of the Thirston Tankard joining our meeting together with The Cardinal’s District Nurse. Farce ensued.

Meeting closed in disarray at 12.45

Apologies from all those not here.

Present:- CM, LW, MS, PB, CD, TM, TH, PL, ABW (golf only) MC (golf only) DGM, TM, Monty, FB, KS (3 holes only retired hurt but stayed for meeting), Jock Strap (meeting only)

The Chairman welcomed our esteemed member from Beamish, everyone agreed he was a welcome sight!

Competition Results;

Played from the white tees in a westerly gale by the hardy MOHGS. The Chair decreed five three balls and the scores of two to count.

One two at the 17^th by Dewey, so he scooped the pot.

Duffers of the Day were Monty, Crocs and Two Beers with a score no-one would admit to!

Deputy Duffers were Herbie and Marcus with 61 points.

No runner up as there were two winners.

The teams of Scuttler, Geezer and Johnny together with the team Cardinal, Rabbi and Dewey both had creditable 65 points. All received £2.50 each. Handicaps will be adjusted accordingly.

Toasts

The England Cricket team for beating the Indians in an hostile environment in our own country.

Swears raised £6.80, including the Chairman’s fine for inappropriate attire, but Geezers Cards were not in operation.

Previous minutes were agreed.

Matters Arising

Beamish dirty Dozen fixture, Herbie assumed the Captaincy with aplomb. He will e-mail with details and for numbers.

The Scuttler will e-mail re the proposed sojourn to Wall.

The President’s trip to St. Boswells on hold because of his current incapacity.

Shagpile announced the trip to Bedlington for 29 July, the return fixture may have to be on a Tuesday. In which case it would be a pm start because of Ladies tee times at Morpeth.

County Card owners were indicated, a visit would be organised and those that could would. The Terrible Twin Terrys wished it to be known that they were not eligible for County Cards as they were too young!

The Rabbi advised that he was not available to add names on Wednesday 17 July, Two Beers jumped at the chance.

Meeting closed at 1.04

PRESENT: M.M, G.A, T.M(N/P), D.G-M, A.B-W, M.S(N/P), C.D(N/P), T.H, J.G, P.F, P.L, C.M, P.B. K.S.

The President agreed to Chair the meeting.

RESULTS: Delivered by Brains. Only one 2 this week by Dewey on the 17th. DoD was the unfortunate Brains with 24 points. DD’soD were Crocs and Shagpile with 27 points apiece. The runner up was Kwok with 34 points. Joint winners were the popular duo of Scuttler and Winscale with 34 points apiece.

NO TOASTS THIS WEEK!

MINUTES OF LAST WEEK WERE TAKEN AS READ.

MATTERS ARISING: The President has contacted the St. Boswells secretary who informed him that he was welcome to play the course at any time of his choosing. He will make a decision when the weather improves.

* Shagpile is hoping to secure a visit to Bedlington GC on 29 July. He hopes to plan a return visit for the Bedlington group to play at Morpeth.

* The 15 July is Red Carpet day for Shagpile. He will be placing £75 behind the bar. He has invited several friends of US origin to help him celebrate the momentous occasion and has dusted down the Witton Royal Rose Bowl, which will be awarded to the winner.

There being no further business, the President called a halt to proceedings at 1.15pm.

Burt.

In Attendance: CM JBG ABW FB KS DF MM RH TM PL AL GA DGM JG

In recognition of the significant birthday of the Hon.  President (Soapy) The Chairman was persuaded to propose a special toast to Soapy which he did with his usual aplomb. It was greeted with much cheering and applause.

Results:

DoD was Soapy with 19 points (perhaps understandably given the magnitude of the day). His handicap will go up by 2.

DDoD was our beloved migrant Jockstrap with 20 points. handicap to go up by 1 point.

In second place was the Geezer with a very credible 37 points. He won £4.00 and his handicap is to be pulled by one shot.

The Winner was the ever popular and jocular Croc with a splendid 39 points. He took away £10.00 but more importantly the honour of holding the Soapy dish Trophy for the next 12 months. Handicap to be pulled by 2 shots.

Toasts:

The Chairman proposed a very special toast to Winker Watson who has indicated he is to give up golf for health reasons. As the Chair said however, once a Mohg always a Mohg. Winker will always be welcome in our company and we wish him well for the future.

Rory Mcilroy for winning the Canadian Open

A toast to Her Maj on her official birthday.

Biggles for proposing said toast.

Two Beers for stepping in, and doing so well, as Captain for the match against the Dirty Dozen.

Chris Minto for organising the visit to City for Mohgs on the Seniors Invitation Day.

Minutes of last meeting were accepted

Matters Arising:

The President referred to the proposed trip to St. Boswells on Friday 14th June. Due to the dire weather forecast and the Chair’s other golf commitments it has been postponed.

Jockstrap said that, on behalf of the Dirty Dozen, he wished to thank us for a thoroughly enjoyable day. A  return match at Beamish is proposed for 9th September. The Chair suggested that,in order to ensure there were sufficient numbers on both sides there should be some flexibility as to who played for who.This was agreed by all present.

Shagpile raised the trip to Bedlington and is to investigate dates. Brains suggested that, as there is a comp. on 29th July and so no tee times available for us, we consider that date. Shagpile is to see if that date is possible.

The Chair mentioned the question of County Cards,as previously raised by Herbie, and suggested that anyone who wished to get one should do so. He did, however, raise a doubt about being able to block book using the cards. A degree of ingenuity may be required. Answers on a postcard please!

Meeting officially closed at 1.30.

Post meeting:

President pointed out that he had said entertainment was to be provided to celebrate his birthday. He apologised to the Geezer for the lack of Nubile Dancers and proceeded to introduce a quiz worthy of Mensa. Attempts to answer were brave if not noteworthy!

Shagpile offered thanks to Soapy for an excellent 45 minutes of drink and good cheer. A sentiment that was echoed by all.

The game was organised by Crocs because Morpeth GC was hosting an invitation day.

PRESENT: B.Y, L.W, D.G-M, T.M, D.F, M.S, C.M, F.B, G.A, P.F, J.G(l/e).

RESULTS: Delivered by the Laird who it appears is back to his fighting best after a short period of recuperation following the operation to allow him to collect his winnings more efficiently. He opened by remarking that the weather had been very kind and the course was in good condition. There were no 2’s so the cash was added to the pot. DoD was the unfortunate Brains with 19 points. Winscales was DDoD with a slightly better haul of 26 points. The runner up was Kwok with 34 points. The winner with a mighty 35 points was the aforementioned Laird who nimbly pocketed the cash (kerching), before stressing that today’s game was a one off and the winners would not be pulled, neither would the losers gain shots.

Herbie proposed a vote of thanks to Crocs for organising the event, which was wholeheartedly endorsed by the group.

TOASTS: To 2Beers for standing in at short notice and captaining the MOHGS to their heroic victory over the DD.

To the Geezer who won Saturday’s competition.

BUSINESS: Herbie proposed that all MOHGS should purchase a County Card since the benefits of playing at different courses far outweighed the initial on-cost. There followed a debate on whether or not the expense was justified but no conclusion was reached. This debate has legs and may run for some time.

The Geezer proposed that the MOHGS should all join a ‘What’s App.’ He then proceeded to explain the benefits of such a device for group discussions and deliberations. Head scratching became the order of the day as the technophobes battered the Luddites with a plethora of information. The Chair capitulated in the face of defeat and began to come to terms with the fact that his phone is smarter than he is. The Geezer continued his argument and finished by saying that a County Card plus a What’s App could open up a whole new horizon for the MOHGS. The debate continues.
L.W, P.F, and B.Y apologised in advance for their absence on Monday for Soapy’s Day.

There being no further business, the meeting closed amiably at 3pm.

Burt E. Kwok

THE MOHGS v THE DIRTY DOZEN.

The day was windy but warm as the contestants gathered for bacon sandwiches in the clubhouse. The Dirty Dozen arrived promptly for the start of play and 2 Beers announced the format of the competition, which was a Four Ball Better Ball matchplay which also included a Stableford element. 2 Beers wished all competitors good luck and the battle commenced in pre-arranged groups.

RESULTS: Jock St.Rappe in his old familiar role of Comp. Sec., compiled the results which were delivered by Captain for the day, 2 Beers. He opened his remarks by saying that golf was a series of tragedies punctuated by the occasional miracle. He thanked the Beamish boys for their sportsmanship and looked forward to the return match. The MOHGS won the contest by a score of 5-1. There was a tie for the overall betterball winners between the pairing of Kwok and Wellend and the duo of the Cardinal and the Geezer with 42 points apiece. The DD winners were Sean(?) and Ian Bailey. The MOHGS runners up were Winscales and Monty.

Jock Strap replied on behalf of the DD and began by thanking 2 Beers for organising the day in impeccable style. He remarked that it had been a hugely enjoyable day although the result was underwhelming. He looked forward to the return match which he hoped would be sometime in September to which all were warmly invited. Information will be revealed in due course.

BURT E. KWOK.