PRESENT: P.L, M.C, P.B, J.G, M.M, C.M, P.F, T.H, J.P, L.W, B.Y, D.F, A.B-W.

RESULTS: No 2’s were posted, therefore £2.60 is carried over to next week. DoD’s were, Shagpile, the Rabbi and Brains with a deplorable 33 points apiece. They all have a rise of 2 shots. DD’soD were Bumpers and the Laird with 35 points. The runner up was Crocs with 43 points. The winner with an unassailable 44 points was the newest recruit to the MOHGS! Laurie Walker. L.W has yet to be given a nickname but the association with a certain manufacturer of crisps, may conjure some ideas. He will be pulled 2 shots for the next game.

GEEZERS CARDS: D.F(20p), J.P(40p), T.H(20p), J.G(40p), P.B(40p), C.M(40p), B.Y(20p), M.M(20p), A.B-W(20p)—–£2.60.

SWEARS and FINES: £3.00. D.F and P.F were penalised 50p apiece for not wearing regulation gear.

The Rabbi once again stepped into the gaping void, created by the absent Chair and agreed to Chair the meeting.

TOASTS: To Paxo for a hole in one at the 16th on Wednesday.

To Kwok, Prof and Shotgun who all appeared in the frame last week.

To Laura Mears who won gold in 2 events at the recent European indoor championship.

Brains was thanked for updating and adjusting the h/cap sheet in the absence of the Chair.

Last week’s minutes were accepted in their entirety as being perfect.

FINANCES: The Fin. Sec. rattled his box and announced that there was £96.50 in the kitty which was reasonable but advised against complacency and encouraged the members to swear more frequently, to swell the coffers. He had further bad news, in that he is considering banning all £1 coins, since they will no longer become legal tender in October. He has been a regular attendee at the bank recently to swap old coinage for notes and thus stay ahead of the curve. He would not be drawn on possible usage of the cash, but hinted that there could well be a windfall for the Hunley trip.

AOB: The Bridle Path is booked on Friday for a 9.30 KO. Brains will enquire about the use of trolleys and report his findings via the Blog.

CHRISTMAS PARTY: The club has appointed new caterers. It was agreed that we should keep our powder dry, before making any rash decisions about engaging them to provide party fare.

There was a suggestion that wives might be allowed on away days, but it petered out very quickly.

Crocs, after conducting some research on his mobile, announced that the MOHGS diary was indeed included on the MOHGS blog but unfortunately the print was too small for him to make head or tail of it.

The Chair called a harmonious close to proceedings at 12.55.

Burt.

PRESENT: J.P, B.H, T.H, B.Y, J.G, P.B, P.L, M.C, A.B-W, C.M, D.F(n/p), P.F, M.M(n/p).

As there were 12 people present it was decided that today’s competition would be a 4 ball better ball.

RESULTS: Delivered by Mr. D.F who had not played today but had come to do his duty in the absence of the current Comp. Sec. who is on holiday. There was one 2 by Kwok and El Mat who scooped the pot. D’soD were the Cardinal and the Prof with a meagre 40 points. DD’soD were Rabbi & Shotgun, Crocs & the Scuttler, Brains & Bumpers, all with 45 points. Runners up were J. Strappe & Paxo with 47 points. The winning combo with an amazing 54, yes 54 points, were El Mat &  Kwok. The winners will be docked one shot each and the losers will gain one shot each.

£1.80 was collected in swears. Geezers cards—-T.H(40p), P.L(40p), B.Y(60p), J.G(60p), P.B(20p)——-£2.20 in total.

The Rabbi Chaired today’s meeting due to the absence of the reigning Chair.

LAST WEEKS MINUTES WERE ACCEPTED AS A TRUE ACCOUNT.

MATTERS ARISING:

Bumpers did not receive last week’s minutes and presumably will not receive these because he is not on the list of contacts. The Chair will need to rectify this situation upon his return.

BRIDLE PATH: All systems go for Friday 10 March for a 9.30 KO. The cost will be £12/punter but this will include either a pint or a bacon bap and a cup of coffee.

HUNLEY HALL: Brains reported that all preparations have now been made.

NEWBIGGIN: Shagpile announced that there were a couple of Charity events coming up at Newbiggin. On Friday 5 May it is Lifeboat Day when the cost of a day’s play would be £15 which includes a meal in the clubhouse. On Tuesday 25 April, a Texas Scramble charity event is planned when the cost would be £32 for a 4 man team. Several MOHGS signified an interest in one or both events. Shagpile would like to have definite numbers as soon as possible so that he can make suitable arrangements.

AOB: The Geezer has not played for several weeks, the reason being is that he has bought himself a pedigree Boxer dog and is in the process of house training the little creature.

The time was 1.13 when the Rabbi in dulcet tones declared that the meeting had run its course and it was time for home.

BURT

PRESENT: B.Y, K.S(n/p), C.D, C.M, E.E, D.F, G.W, J.G, B.H, P.B, M.M, A.B-W, P.F, M.C, T.H, P.L, F.B.

RESULTS: Today’s game was a doubles competition. One 2 was posted by the Prof, who scooped £4.40 including £1.20 from the previous week. DoD were Brains and J. Strappe with 39 points. DDoD were Kwok and Jethro, Crocs and El Mat and the Rabbi and Straggler, all on 42 points. Runners up were, Scuttler and Bumpers, Prof and Shotgun and Laird and Cardinal with 44 points each. The winners with a magnificent 47 points were Dewy and Shagpile.

£2.20 was collected in swears, which is being held in safekeeping by Shotgun, together with £2 in prize money, belonging to Scuttler and Bumpers.

TOASTS: To Michael Beaton aka Lord Snooty for keeping the MOHGS blog operational. The blog can be accessed at mohgs.com and contains a wealth of information in the historic data garnered from years of very interesting minutes.

LAST WEEKS MINUTES WERE ACCEPTED AS ACCURATE THOUGH BADLY INFORMED.

MATTERS ARISING: Kwok believed he was erroneously vilified via a scurrilous and badly informed set of minutes which virtually amounted to a character assassination and demanded a full retraction as well as an unmitigated apology. He was given neither. The Chair using all the power vested in his mighty office refused to budge and told Kwok to put an egg in his shoe and beat it.

BUSINESS: The Cardinal ventured the thought that now we had mastered the art of blogging, we should go the whole hog and open a twitter account.

BRIDLE PATH: No progress, although an attempt to contact the pro had been made by wily old Crocs.

HUNLEY HALL: All arrangements have been completed in exemplary fashion by the fastidious and resourceful Brains.

CHRISTMAS: It was decided that we should use the Golf Club as the venue for the party and decide on catering nearer the time.

AOB: The Chair will be on holiday for the next several weeks enjoying a well deserved break with Mrs B. He mentioned several times during today’s meeting that he felt as if he was now virtually running a one man show, especially in the light of his work load last week when he also took on the onerous responsibility of producing the minutes on top of everything else. The Chair deserves respect for pulling out all the stops and ploughing his furrow with such aplomb and good humour and applying himself with vigour and determination for the greater good of the Society.

The meeting closed at 1.28.

Kwok.

It was a dreek day when seven hardy souls (FB, MC, DF, JG, TH, KS, and BY) turned up.   Much I should imagine like Agincourt when absent MOHGS ‘lay accursed in their beds’.   The true hero was The President who could only manage five holes but returned for the meeting.   The Rabbi apparently could not make it because he was getting rid of his ‘old boiler’ – bang goes the Christmas corned beef pie.   Anyway, on with the results:-

Champion, The Scuttler with a credible 44 points

Runners-up, Brains and the Prof with 41 points

Deputy Duffer, The Laird with 39 points

Duffer, Bumpers with 37 points.

No 2s were recorded and swears were dispensed with for the day, there were no toasts.  

Last week’s minutes were accepted with some disquiet.   The Clerk was criticised for failure to include the whole of the United Kingdom in Her Majesty’s realm.  His subsequent attempt to blame the Competition Secretary for this ‘faux pas’ only exacerbated the situation.   The meeting accepted that the Chair, on taking on additional responsibility had acted honourably, much like the little Dutch boy who saved the situation by sticking his digit in.   In the circumstances the Clerk was issued with a severe reprimand, a minor reprimand was issued to the Cardinal for perceived disrespect to Scotland and the Scottish aristocracy.

Brains collected outstanding deposits for the Hunley Hall trip.   Next week’s tee times are as per normal and the meeting closed at 12.50. 

PRESENT: P.B, D.F, C.M, M.C, M.M, B.Y, T.H, F.B, P.F, C.D, G.W, P.L.

RESULTS: Three 2’s were carded, 2 by M.C and 1 by P.F. DoD with a meagre 32 points was the Prof. DD’soD were Kwok, Straggler, Dewy, Crocs and the Scuttler with 40 points apiece. The runners up were the Rabbi and the Laird with 45 points. The winner and this week’s champine with a respectable 47 points was the ever popular Matador.

FINANCE: £2.00 was collected in Geezers cards. £4.40 was collected in swears and jumper fines.

TOASTS: To Her Majesty, who is celebrating 65 years as Queen of England.

To the Rabbi, Prof and Brains who were second in last week’s Seniors Comp.

HUNLEY HALL: Most deposits have now been paid but any outstanding payments must be delivered to Brains next Monday at the latest.

BRIDLE PATH: 3 tees will be booked for Friday 3 March, for a 9.30-10am KO. There appeared to be many interested punters but final numbers will no doubt be bottomed out closer to the time.

FINANCIAL STATEMENT: The Fin. Sec. assured the members that we are at present on a sound financial footing and that we will no doubt be in receipt of a substantial subsidy for the forthcoming trip to Hunley.

There being no other business, the meeting closed at 12.55.

Kwok.

PRESENT: B.H, D.F, F.B, P.L, E.E, P.B, C.D, T.H, B.Y,P.F, J.G, A.B-W, M.C, C.M. K.S( n/p).

GEEZERS CARDS: B.H(60p), F.B(20p), P.L(20p), E.E(40p), T.H(40p), B.Y(20p), P.F(20p), A.B-W(60p).——–£2.80.

Swears were also £2.80. which included a carry over of 80p from last week.

RESULTS: There was one 2 posted by M.C who scooped a prize of £2.80. DoD was E.E with a paltry 29 points. DDoD was B.H with 37 points. Joint runners up were the Chair and Prof with 44 points apiece. The winner was wily old Crocs with an outstanding 46 points.

TOASTS: To Jethro and the President who have been absent for several weeks.

To the Rabbi, the Scuttler, the Laird and the Prof who won the Seniors Comp., two weeks ago.

J.G proposed a special vote of thanks to the newly installed Comp. Sec. for his prompt delivery of the minutes.

HUNLEY HALL: There are now 12 members who are definitely attending the Hunley Hall bash. A deposit of £30 will be required no later than a week on Monday. The remaining balance will be required before the end of April.

BRIDLE PATH: Crocs has discovered that the cost of a day’s play plus a bacon sarnie and pint will be £12/person. He will attempt to book the tee for a date in March, possibly on a Friday.

The Cardinal revealed that he has had little response to his posting about possible future away days. G.W had suggested Hollins Hall near Bingley, but this suggestion was given a lukewarm reception by others who had played the course. Apparently the first hole is set on a hill, so precipitous, that crampons are required to gain access. Foxton was suggested as a possible overnighter but others thought that since it was so close, it was unnecessary to stay overnight. The Chair who had manfully attempted to steer the conversation to a meaningful conclusion, began to realise that he was flogging a dead horse and decided to put all suggestions for future away days on hold until the next meeting.

The meeting closed in good spirits at 1.10pm.

Kwok.

PRESENT: M.C(left early), Clive Dewison(new member), A.B-W, B.H, P.F, A.W, J.G, B.Y, J.P.

Many of the regulars were today playing in Calcutta Cup matches.

Due to the absence of the Straggler, Mr. B.H agreed to Chair today’s meeting.

RESULTS: Presented by Winker. There were 2×2’s posted by the Prof and Dewy. DoD with 35 points was Dewy. DDoD was J.P with 36 points. The runner up with 44 points was the Prof. Joint winners with 46 points apiece were the ever popular duo of Bumpers and St. Rappe.

FINANCE: There were no Geezers cards in operation. £0.80 was collected in swears.

OTHER SCORES: P.F—- 41, J.G—-41, A.W—-39, A.B-W—-42.

Clive Dewison’s email is —– dewison@btinternet.com, Jim Paxton’s new email is jamespaxton28@gmail.com.

TOASTS: Tommy Fleetwood who won the Abu Dhabi Classic.

To our most recent new member Clive Dewison.

HUNLEY HALL: Brains announced that there are 11 interested parties and that he is prepared to make the booking for 14-15 May. It is unfortunate that there will be people missing out due to unforeseen circumstances, but there will always be someone who cannot make a particular date. If anyone else is interested and has not yet contacted Brains, please do so at your earliest convenience.It is hoped that tee off time on Sunday can be reserved for 1pm, whilst on Monday it is hoped to be 10.30am. A deposit of £30/person will be required in the fullness of time. Brains reminded the group that we will be playing for the coveted Hunley Hall Trophy. A.B-W revealed that he is the current holder of the Soapy trophy for going in the water most often and will bring said trophy to Hunley to present to the next lucky water baby.

The game against Beamish will be here on 17 July with the return match at Beamish on September 11.

* It was felt that Lady members should be welcomed into the Society if they have the inclination.

Jock Strap agreed to keep the money for safekeeping, namely £3.50 for Marcus and £0.80 in swears.

The meeting finished on the most friendly of terms at 1.10pm.

Kwok.

PRESENT: D.F, P.F, A.B-W, B.Y, M.C, J.G, P.B, B.H, T.H, F.B, C.M.

RESULTS: Only 1×2 was carded by the Laird on the 16th hole. D’soD were Shotgun and Crocs with 37 points apiece. DDoD was Bumpers with 38 points. The runner up with a creditable 44 points was the Scuttler. The winner and champine of the week with a remarkable haul of 48 points was the ever affable and popular Laird.

Terry Henderson’s email address is —-terryhenderson57@gmail.com.

FINANCE: No Geezer’s cards were in operation. £1.70 was collected in swears.

TOASTS: To the Prof whose birthday is today.

To Graham Storm who won the S.African Open.

To the Cardinal who actually did get to show his backside in Fenwicks window, but in a very innocent and sensitive manner. Mrs. B. also revealed her backside to the great British public from the same venue, but again in an extremely tasteful manner.

LAST WEEKS MINUTES ACCEPTED IN THEIR ENTIRETY.

BUSINESS:

* The Cardinal has been looking into away day possibilities and will post a list of suitable contenders for perusal and further discussion.

* Brains has been working feverishly behind the scenes to secure a booking for Hunley Hall. However prices have risen considerably since our last visit and he has used every ounce of his renowned negotiating skills to engineer a price which was more acceptable to the membership. Upon first enquiring, Brains was informed that the price of a double room was £129, and a single room was £154. He then applied lickings of charm and managed to reduce the costs to £119 for a twin and £139 for a single. The old codger was still not satisfied and redoubled the charm offensive. He finally secured a deal whereby the double room cost was reduced to £109 and the single to £129. To boot the manager of H.H offered to throw in the use of buggies for free. Gasps of admiration accompanied his final pronouncement and to cap it all Brains was singled out for direct praise from the Chair. The venue will therefore be booked for 14th-15th of May and all interested parties are required to contact Brains before the end of this week to indicate their preferences for single or double occupancy.

* Crocs will enquire as to the availability of the Bridle Path as a possible future venue.

* The Laird announced that the the Rabbi was unwell. There was a spontaneous show of concern for his wellbeing and a toast was proposed for a speedy recovery and a return to good health. The Laird has booked the course for the usual times next week.

* The Chair announced that he has deeply pondered the thorny problem of women joining the MOHG fraternity. He was concerned that they may be tempted not primarily by the golf but more by the thoughts of joining the ranks of such a good looking group of chaps. In short he felt that sexual attraction might be paramount in their decision to become involved with the membership and he had no intention of being seen as eye candy. There was much shuffling and head scratching as the group attempted to come to terms with his pronouncement and it was left hanging for future debate.

* The new Comp. Sec. is now one full week into the job and insisted that although he was enjoying the role immensely, he was willing to stand aside if there was anyone suitable, to replace him. He was met by a wall of silence.

* The previous Comp. Sec., recommended that the new Comp. Sec. bring a list of current h/caps each Monday. The new Comp. Sec. thought that this was unnecessary but would take it on board. He further stated that if a member forgot their h/cap on a Monday, they should play off their current club h/cap-2.

* Shagpile will be on holiday for another week and the Cardinal will be absent next week.

The meeting closed in reasonable spirits at 1.28.

BURT.

PRESENT: B.H, P.F, T.M, E.E(all n/ p), B.Y, D.F, G.W, F.B, C.M, J.G, P.L, M.C, A.W, K.S, P.B, M.M.

RESULTS: Today’s competition was a 4BBB pairs event. There were 2×2’s posted by teams Prof & El Mat and Straggler & Soapy who received £2.20 per pair. DoD’s were team Straggler and Soapy with 40 points. DDoD’s were the Cardinal and Shagpile with 42 points. Crocs and the Laird were the ultimate winners with 46 points.

PRESENTATION OF TROPHIES:

The President presented the trophies.

The Christmas Plate to P.B.

The Chairmans Quaich to B.H, for the second year running.

Soapy’s Dish to Soapy/Scuttler.

The MOHGS Championship Trophy to the Scuttler, who unfortunately was not present.

GEEZERS CARDS: B.Y(20p), G.W(20p), F.B(20p), M.M(20p), J.G(20p), A.W(20p)—-£1.20. £1.80 was collected in swears.

The Rabbi refused to collect any more cash and handed over £9.70 to the Fin. Sec.

TOASTS: To John Gibson on the event of his birthday.

To Kwok for setting up today’s agenda.

STATEMENT FROM THE CHAIR: The Chair was pleased with the progress made during the year and remarked that new members had fitted in very well. However he urged that we do not become complacent and continue to strive for excellence. He further proposed that we attempt to have more away days in 2017.

PRESIDENT’S STATEMENT: The President thanked everyone for their support in what had been a very difficult time for him with the loss of his beloved wife Margaret. He valued the friendships he had formed within the MOHGS.

The Chair proposed a toast to Lady Margaret.

FINANCIAL STATEMENT: The Fin. Sec. revealed that the current assets now stand at £70.70. A total of £110 had been placed behind the bar for refreshments during the Christmas party. He insisted that the integrity of all MOHGS is beyond question. He also revealed that Mrs. B, may have become the first female MOHG but was at present suffering with a very painful foot. B.H thanked the Fin. Sec. for his stalwart efforts in keeping the club solvent. The Fin. Sec. insisted that the Geezers cards had been of paramount importance in contributing to a healthy set of accounts.

STATEMENT BY THE COMP. SEC.: The Comp. Sec. was forced to speak off the cuff, since his pre prepared notes had disappeared in a gust of wind as he climbed out of his car. He announced that 50 games had been played last year. There had been away days at the Bridle Path, Close House, Hunley Hall, Arcot Hall and Newbiggin. There had been matches against Southport, Beamish and Bedlington. The eclectic winner for the second year running was Crocs. The Laird was the top money winner. Crocs had posted the most 2’s however Winker had won the most 2’s cash. The Scuttler had won the most money per game on average. The most improved h/cap over the year was the Laird. The Comp. Sec. finished by thanking everyone who had helped him during his tenure in office.

The President made a last ditch effort to persuade the Comp. Sec. to remain in office but his entreaties were rebuffed by the Comp. Sec., who stuck to his guns and remarked that he believed that all senior management should have a shelf life of 4 years max and then step aside for new blood and new ideas to take over.

A straw poll conducted by the Chair revealed that the majority of MOHGS believed that individual members of management should stay in position for as long as they wished, with the proviso that they were fulfilling their role adequately.

The Laird was asked if he would be willing to take over the role of Comp. Sec. but he politely declined.

The Chair came galloping to the rescue. He could keep his powder dry no longer and with a flourish, announced that he would become the next Comp. Sec. Stunned silence greeted this new revelation as he further insisted that he would show his naked buttocks in Fenwicks window if he did not sort out the h/cap system by next week. There was a deep collective intake of breath at the audacity of his timing and sheer casual confidence.

The Chair thanked Brains for beginning the new diary for 2017. The Soc. Sec. announced that he will select some viable venues for away days and report back at the next meeting. Brains agreed to organise the Hunley Hall trip for a date to be decided in May.

Delboy is taking orders for new gear and anyone in need of replacement garments should place their order with the Chair asap.

The meeting closed harmoniously at 2 pm.

BURT

Apologies from all those not here.

Present:- RH, FB, WS, PL, JG, MM, DF & CM. KS did not play but attended the meeting. BY and GW played but left before the meeting.

Competition Results;

No twos posted so £2.00 carried forward to next week

Duffer of the Day was Windscale with 25 points and Deputy Duffer was Jock St Rappe with 28 points.

In joint second place were The straggler and the Rabbi with 38 points, however the winner and champ for the week was the Prof  with a magnificent 43 points.

Handicaps to be adjusted as per the rules of MOHGS.

Geezers Cards were in play; A total of £?.?? collected.

Swears made £1.50

Tee times booked for next week – 08.48 – 09.04 am

Toasts Mohgs for a successful 2016, the City of Kingston upon Hull for being awarded the “City of Culture” 2017 and the knights and dames  included in the New Year’s honours lists. Jocks abstained on the last matter as he did not believe all recipients were deserving.

Business : The Straggler reported that Del Boy was now in a position to provide further MOHGS attire and those wishing to partake should provide a list of items required including size and colour by the 9th Jan. 2017

Further confirmation was given that the AGM/Presentation day would be held on Monday 9th Jan 2017 and that the hon. Sec. would provide an agenda in the usual format. Advance notice should be given to any thorny questions that may need some careful deliberation by the relevant parties.

The Christmas Party 2017 Discussions were put on hold until meaningful contributions could be obtained.

Away Days: not discussed

Resignation of the Competition Secretary The Straggler reported that his offspring, Lord Snooty and Desmond would be prepared on receipt of the weekly information to produce the necessary spread sheet. St Rappe commented that although this was most commendable and substantially more than any other individuals had offered he believed that the position required someone who attended on a regular basis in order to make instantaneous decisions on competition format, local rules etc. He also reiterated his comments in his resignation letter that new blood with fresh ideas should be installed about every 4 years.

The meeting closed at about 1.45pm.