PRESENT: K.S, B.Y, P.L, E.E, P.F, J.G, T.M, F.B, B.H,A.L, C.M.

Next week is a Bank Holiday but tees have been booked at the usual times for those who fancy a game.

APOLOGIES: From all who are not mentioned above. T.M will be away for two weeks.

RESULTS: 1×2 posted by the Prof who collected £2 in prize money. DoD with 14 points was our out of sorts President, Soapy. DDoD was the Prof with 29 points. The Geezer was runner up with 40 points. The ultimate winner with a magnificent 46 points, was he ever popular Brains. As an unexpected bonus, Brains was also awarded an umbrella as a secondary prize from the coffers of the ever resourceful and generous Delboy.

GEEZER’S CARDS: P.L(20p), P.F(20p), B.Y(80p), J.G(40p), K.S(20p), C.M(40p), A.L(20p), F.B(20p)——-£2.60.

TOASTS: To the all conquering Highwaymen for their 4-1 victory over Hereford.

To Hereford for their show of sportsmanship after defeat.

To the two MOHGS who were successful in last week’s senior’s, namely Brains and Paxo.

To Rory for his victory in the Irish Masters.

To the sons and daughters of MOHGS who attended the Vase final at Wembley.

LAST WEEKS MINUTES FROM HUNLEY WERE ACCEPTED UNANIMOUSLY except—–

Kwok was perceived by the Comp. Sec. to have omitted to mention in the minutes that D.F & B.H had been second in one of the competitions. Kwok counter claimed that he had not been informed of this fact by the Hon. Comp. Sec. There was an impasse in which neither complainant was willing to give way, therefore the Chair cut through the old Gordian Knot and ruled that we move the meeting forward.

There was confusion about the allocation of prize money at Hunley. It appears that the Hon. Comp. Sec had used his own cash to ensure that winners were paid their due amount. It was agreed unanimously that he should be reimbursed from the tin and not suffer any financial loss on account of this accounting error. The Chair ruled that possession is 9/10ths of the law and all winners should be allowed to hold on to their cash. There was a roar of approval from the winners.

BUSINESS OF THE DAY: There appears to have been little progress in the Chairman’s Quaiche comp. The only result so far is that D.F defeated G.W and is therefore through to the next round. All first round matches must be completed by 23rd June.

J.G was proud to announce that the Professional at Hunley had commented on the exemplary behaviour of the MOHGS during their visit.

Brains was thanked for his organisation of the event.

Next week is a Bank Holiday and the following week is Soapy Day. The generous old codger will once again put money behind the bar, equivalent to a pound for each year he has roamed the planet. It was proposed that the starting time be delayed to 10.15 and the Comp. would be conducted with 4 clubs and a putter. There would be a snooker and pool competition after the main event. J.G is the current holder of the trophy and assured the group that he would remember to return it on the day.

B.H graciously agreed to take all cash for safekeeping. This included the Geezers winnings of £3 plus £2.80 in swears.

There being no other biz, the meeting closed at 1.30.

BURT ( Klerk).

PRESENT: K.S, B.H, P.L, P.F, B.Y, D.F, C.M, F.B, M.C, P.B, M.M, J.G.

APOLOGIES: For next week, D.F and P.B.

The annual trip to Hunley had finally arrived and expectation and excitement hung heavy in the salty sea air. The weather was splendid and the course was green and lush. The panoramic views from the clubhouse overlooking the sea were enough to stir the souls of the most hardened amongst the fellowship. The boys were ready like spring coils to begin the action. The Comp. Sec. announced that the first game would be a stableford competition, for the Hunley Hall trophy, which had been returned by the current holder, the Cardinal.

RESULTS: There were 3 x 2’s posted by the Straggler, Crocs and Shagpile. DoD was the Prof with 24 points. DDoD with 27 points was the Laird. The runners up with 37 points apiece were the Rabbi and the Straggler. There were joint winners who will each hold the coveted trophy for 6 months, Crocs and Jocks, with 39 points apiece. The Cardinal presented the trophy to the joint winners and congratulated them for their stalwart efforts.

The Comp. Sec. announced that the second day’s play would be a Fourball better ball competition when all competitors would be allowed 90% of their current MOHGS h/cap.

DAY 2.:

The Draw: Soapy & Brains v Shagpile & Prof

Crocs & Kwok v Straggler & Cardinal

Bumpers & Rabbi v Laird & Jocks

RESULTS: One 2 was posted by the Prof. DoD were Crocs and Kwok with 35 points. Joint runners up with 39 points apiece were Soapy & Brains and Cardinal & Straggler. The winners with a magnificent 41 points were Shagpile and the Prof. The winner of the best aggregate for two rounds was Jocks. The Straggler was in second place. The random 3 man team winners were Crocs, Kwok and Shagpile. Soapy, Rabbi and Brains were second.

TOASTS: To Brains for his thorough meticulous organisation of the event.

To the Comp. Sec. who once again fulfilled his role with the usual aplomb.

To the President for organising the previous week’s competition v the Ainsdale mob.

To Crocs and Stevie Warwick who won the Jubilee Trophy.

To all the MOHGS who have succeeded in the Wednesday competitions.

Shagpile has booked 3 tees for a competition at Arcot Hall on 27 June. Interested parties should contact him to book a place.

The Laird is also due a mention for his organisation of the cryptic quiz on Sunday evening, as well as his Fanny Green story which tickled the funny bones and became a running joke for the weekend.

The Chairman concluded affairs by thanking all the organisers for their efforts. He further remarked that the weekend had proved to be a triumph of sporting excellence, enhanced by good weather and camaraderie of the highest order. He was also pleased that the affair had passed without any raucous incidents and that everyone had behaved in a pleasant and gentlemanly fashion.

Kwok (Klerk).

PRESENT: J.P, T.M, J.G, C.M, G.W, P.F, K.S, B.Y, A.L, F.B, B.H.

APOLOGIES: Next week from G.W. Next week is a Bank Holiday, therefore there may be quite a few absentees.

RESULTS: No 2’s were posted therefore £2.20 is carried over together with £2.80 from the previous week. DoD was Soapy with 26 points. DDoD was Paxo with 27 points. Jock St. Rappe was the runner up with 36 points. There were joint winners with 37 points apiece, Kwok and Biggles. This is Biggles second consecutive week in the winners enclosure and quite richly deserved.

£1.60 was collected in swears.

TOASTS: To last week’s winners of the seniors competition, namely the Rabbi, the Laird, Brains and Kwok.

To H.M the Queen who celebrated her 90th birthday.

LAST WEEKS MINUTES WERE ACCEPTED UNSEEN IN THEIR ENTIRETY.

MATTERS ARISING:

* The President is compiling a list of combatants for the game against the Rubble gang. He needs at least 14 members and is confident that he will fulfil this quota. Preference will be given to the members who made the trip to Ainsdale and all successful candidates will be notified next week.

GEEZERS CARDS: F.B(20p), J.G(20p), B.Y(60p), K.S(20p), T.M(40p), A.L(80p), J.P(40p).—–£2.80.

There was uncertainty about whether the Rabbi had booked the tees for next week, since it is a Bank Holiday. The Chair was convinced that tees would be booked and advised prospective players to attend at the usual times.

The meeting closed at 1.40.

Kwok ( Klerk)

The fraternity was ensconced for an overnighter at Close House, expectations were running high at the promise of a fun filled and competitive couple of days of festivity. The weather was good the accommodation first class and the company in high spirits.

PRESENT: A.B-W, B.Y, M.C, F.B, B.H, C.M, P.F, J.G, P.B, D.F, A.M and L.Walker.

RESULTS: No 2’s were posted. The game was a 4 ball better ball competition. D’soD were the Cardinal and Shotgun with 31 points. In joint second place were the Straggler and Jocks and the Prof and Laird with 36 points. The winners with a magnificent 38 points were Laurie and Bumpers.

TOASTS: To Danny Willett, the Masters winner.

To the whole MOHG fraternity for the reflected glory of three members who recorded first, second and third place in last week’s senior’s competition. The Chair, the Laird and the Cardinal respectively.

To the Cardinal for his immaculate organisation of the outing.

There was a vote in favour of having the evening meal at Close House.

An event worthy of note was that the runner up at the Masters tournament, the previous day, Lee Westwood, entered the building and was warmly congratulated by the patrons. It was amazing to think that only 24 hour previouslyish, we had all been glued to the television watching him play at Augusta.

The meeting closed at 5.55.

************************************

The boys booked in and retired to their respective rooms to change for dinner. The rooms were all very classy and huge. It was immediately obvious that we were getting good value for our hard earned cash.

The meal was a culinary treat in beautiful surroundings and with good company. Thoroughly satiated and tired from the days exertions the weary group trudged to their various outposts for a well deserved rest and to recharge the batteries for the contest the following day.

***************************************

12 APRIL.

PRESENT: Laurie Walker was replaced by Winker and the Geezer replaced the Kid, who was starting his new job.

The Comp. Sec. presented today’s order of play at the breakfast table whilst the boys were tucking into a full English with all the trimmings. New pairings were established and the battle commenced. However the weather was inclement to say the least and heavy overnight rain had forced the closure of two holes. Undaunted the contestants set out on their new adventure full of hope and expectation.

RESULTS: There was one 2, scooped by lucky old Winker who also scooped a sizeable pot. D’soD were Jocks and Brains with 27 points. There were joint winners with 32 points apiece, Kwok and the Cardinal and Crocs and Winker. The Straggler and the Prof were runners up. The Comp. Sec., having been battered by the elements decided to work out the 5’s and 3’s competition at his leisure and will report back at the next meeting.

The Chair in his final official role, thanked the Comp. Sec. for once again formulating the plan of the competitions, the pairings and the order of play. The sentiment was echoed by the congregation and a round of applause was offered in thanks for his stalwart efforts.

The meeting ended at 3.15 and the weary travellers wended their homeward way.

KWOK (Hon. Sec.)

PRESENT: P.L, D.F, P.B, G.W, B.H, C.M, A.B-W, T.M, F.B, P.F, M.M.

APOLOGIES: K.S, A.L, B.Y, J.G, M.C.

RESULTS: No 2’s posted. £1.40 will be carried forward. DoD was the Rabbi with 32 points. DDoD was El Mat with 33 points. The runner up was J. Strap with 37 points. Today’s champine with a magnificent 39 points was the affable and self effacing Crocs.

£3 was collected in swears.

TOASTS: To the indestructible Mr. R. Hallett who reached the tender age of 70 and joined the ranks of septuagenarians along with several other celebrated MOHGS. His historic milestone was celebrated in line with the MOHGS tradition, instigated by the President, of posting a whole wedge of cash behind the bar for the use and enjoyment of his fellow pilgrims.

To the giant of comedy, Ronnie Corbett MBE who died recently.

To Old Crow, a Native American Indian who had links with the Little Big Horn, who died recently aged 102. Apparently he was camping in the next field to the battle and went to complain to General Custer about the noise.

There was a proposal to change the rule for toasts, in that only golfing achievements should be toasted but this was defeated by a hefty majority and in future most topics of general interest will continue to be celebrated by the fellowship.

LAST WEEKS MINUTES WERE ACCEPTED UNCHALLENGED.

GEEZERS CARDS: M.M —20p, G.W —20p, C.M —80p, A.B-W —60p. £1.80 in total.

CLOSE HOUSE: The first tee times are at 12.30 next Monday, although members were advised to arrive in the clubhouse one hour earlier. Breakfast is provided on Tuesday morning but decisions have to be made about a venue for the meal on Monday evening.

Bedfellows are as follows:

The Strap and the Straggler.

The Cardinal and Shotgun.

Brains and Kwok.

Crocs and the Kid.

The Prof and the Laird.

Winker and Bumpers.

The Kid will not be available on Tuesday, due to starting his new job. Therefore a space is available for a free game for any interested party.

*Four MOHGS intend to play at Morpeth next Monday and others would be most welcome to join them.

* B.H proposed that the next away day after Hunley Hall, should be Durham City golf club. There was pretty much total agreement.

*There was much discussion about the date of the Christmas Party and it was agreed that it was best not to speculate, but wait until Brains and his diary were available for a definitive answer.

The meeting closed at 1.50 but the partying continued to celebrate the birthday boy.

BURT(Hon. Sec.)

Apologies from everyone who was not present.

Ten golfers played. Warm welcome was offered to Simon (The Matador’s son-in law) who could not believe how much he had to pay for the swears and Geezer’s Cards . Well he is a Yorkshire man and will offer a nick name on his next vistit.

No twos were recorded, £2 carry forward to next week..

Duffer of the day was Bumpers with 34 points, who will receive the necessary uplift.

Deputy Duffer was the Cardinal with 36 points, he too will receive an uplift.

In joint second place with 42 points was Shotgun and Brains.

But the winner and overall Champ for the week was the Rabbi who scored 43 points thanks to a magnificent (if somewhat fortunate) eagle on the tenth hole!

Geezers Cards were recorded

Prof. 40p,Cardinal 40p,Bumpers 20p,Simon 60p,Shotgun 20p,Brains 20p,Shagpile 20p.

Swears £1.20 fully accounted for this week!!!

No toasts, but honourable mention to The Cardinal and The Laird who were second and third in last Wednesday’s Seniors competition.

Nothing further to note other that the following suggestions for away days:
Brampton, Brancepeth, Durham City, Arcott Hall, Dunstanburgh, Alndale.

Tee times booked for next week by Rabbi.

Apologies from everyone who was not present.

Eleven hardy souls ventured forth to the course and were rewarded with a lovely day. The golf took second place to the camaraderie, wit and repartee.

Two twos were recorded, both by Winker who pocketed the spoils.

Duffer of the day was Crocs with 32 points, who will receive the necessary uplift.

Deputy Duffers was the ever popular Rabbi with 35 points, he too will receive an uplift according to his performance.

In second place and pocketing even more cash was Winker

But the winner and overall Champ for the week was the Laird who was celebrating the return of Mrs. Laird from a week on Lanzarote with Quok.

Geezers Cards were recorded

Laird 40p,Rabbi 40p,Crocs 80p,Laird 40p,Brains 60p,Soapy 40p.

The Geezer wanted it noted that he did not beat the Chair!

£1.50 was contributed from Jocks, Rabbi and ANO for wrong attire on Friday.

It is with regret that it must be recorded that the swears money was in deficit, at least £2.40 was admitted to but only £1.80 was in the pot!! MOHGS must reflect!

Toasts to Prof for winning the Senior’s Competition two weeks ago. Rabbi and Shotgun for winning the Seniors Comp. last Wednesday. President for ‘bon voyage’ on his Antipodean trip. The Falcon for his return to the fold. Morpeth Town for winning their FA Vase semi-final resulting in a trip to Wembley on 22 May. England Rugby for achieving the Grand Slam. Crocs for organising las t Friday’s excursion to Bridlepath. The Cardinal for recording the meeting. (well everybody else was being toasted.)

Bumpers jumpers are still to be ordered because of Shagpile’s absence. When he returns and places his order the whole consignment will be passed to Delboy for action. Little further was discussed. The Chairman stated that Whitley Bay was off the agenda as it has disappeared and was no longer on dry land.

At the next two meetings, MOHGS members should be in a position to state their preferred away day trip. Tee times booked for next week by Rabbi, those who can will. The meeting then disintegrated as the Chair took a conference call on a mobile phone IN THE CLUBHOUSE.

PRESENT: B.Y, B.H, P.L, C.M, A.W, D.F.

APOLOGIES: All absent friends and acquaintances

No minutes taken – just the following recollections

RESULTS: One 2’s posted by Winker who pockets the £3.00 2s sweep. Today’s event was held at the Bridle Path attended by 6 stalwart golfers. Competition was individual stableford plus an additional pairs prize. Duffer of the Day was Jockstrap with a miserly score of 34 points followed closely by Crocs as Deputy Duffer with 35 points. Team prize goes to the Rabbi & Prof with 76 points [38 ea.] and share £2.00 that being all that was left in the pot ! The individual competition was won by the Laird with an admirable 44 points and the runner up was Winker with an excellent score of 40 points. Handicap adjustments will be made in the usual manner.

BUSINESS:

Jocks proposed thanks to Crocs for his efforts in organising the event which was unanimously accepted  with good cheer.

The Prof gave his apologies for next Monday and asked if anyone was playing the following Monday 28th which is a bank holiday to which some said they were intending to play and the Rabbi would book the tee times.

Fines of £0.50 were imposed on Crocs, Rabbi & Jocks for failing to wear Mohgs gear [which is mandatory for away days]. Rabbi held the cash except that of Jocks who was short of funds so is still in debt to the tune of £0.50

Rabbi confirmed the tee times were booked at Morpeth for next Monday.

Jock St Rappe

PRESENT: F.B, T.M, B.Y, B.H, P.L, C.M, J.G, A.W, A.B-W,P.B, D.F, K.S. & non playing Bumpers back from his jaunt to Los Americas.

APOLOGIES: H.C, G.W, A.L,  M.M, G.A,

RESULTS: One 2’s posted by Team Rabbi \Winker who pocket £4.00 including roll over. Today’s event was a four ball better ball. Joint D’soD were ( Laird & Straggler) and ( Crocs & Brains) and ( Jocks & Shotgun who all achieved  with 44 points. The joint winners with 46 points were teams ( Rabbi & The Winkler ) , (the ever popular Soapy & the Geezer) and ( the Cardinal & Prof.) who all share the proceeds and get docked one shot. The duffers are awarded one customary additional shot.

TOASTS: England R.F.U. for  their  success in the 6 nations.

BUSINESS:

The chair failed to appoint a temporary secretary in the absence of Kwok so no minutes were taken so the following is my recollections of the discussions.

Last week’s minutes accepted.

Swears and Geezers cards contributed an unknown amount to the Mohgs funds.

The chair was irate at the amount of “schrapnel” [copper coinage] offered as payment for 2s etc.

Discussions on out of bounds \in the woods on the right of the 18th took place. Agreed that only one of the two Geezers cards could be awarded if the ball was lost.

Tee time for the Bridle Path on Friday was 10.15 am. Currently 6 participants.

Jocks requested members to confirm they are available for Beamish match and who would require pre-match coffee\tea and bacon sandwiches.

Tee times for next Monday booked from 8.40 am to 9.02 am

Jock St Rappe

PRESENT: F.B, T.M, P.F, B.Y, B.H, P.L, C.M, J.G & a non playing Soapy.

APOLOGIES: H.C, P.B, G.W, A.L, D.F, M.C, M.M, A.W.

£2.60 collected in swears.

RESULTS: No 2’s were posted therefore £1.60 is carried over. Today’s event was a four ball better ball. Joint D’soD were ( Kwoks & Straggler) and ( Crocs & Rabbi) with 45 points. The runners up were ( Geezer & Prof) with 48 points. The winners with an unbeatable 49 points were the ever popular pairing of ( Jocks & Brains).

TOASTS: Team GB cyclists who won the world championships.

The long suffering NU fans who were subjected to yet another miserable performance from their under performing team.

To the newly refurbished bar which was highly rated by the members of the MOHGS.

Kwok apologised for omitting to record last week’s apologies.

MINUTES OF LAST WEEK ACCEPTED UNCHALLENGED.

MATTERS ARISING:

* The Chair will put in a bulk order for jumpers for Bumpers et al when the travellers return from holiday. The Geezer and the Rabbi ordered an extra large white polo shirt and a large red polo shirt respectively, when the final order is made.

* The Rabbi agreed to look after the cash from today’s event.

* Taxi John is still on the case for the Longhirst game.

* The Crocodile has booked three tees for Friday 18th March at the Bridle Path, beginning at 10.16. The deal is a game plus a pint, or a game plus a bacon butty and coffee, for the remarkable price of £10 per punter. There appears to be at least 8 interested parties.

* Jocks has made rapid headway with the Beamish away day. The date will be Monday 11 July at Beamish, with the return leg at Morpeth on Monday 12th September. At least 8 members are interested. He intends to book 6 tee times and estimates that the cost will be approximately £12 per punter. There may be an opportunity to book food for after the games.

* The President enquired about the curry night in Gosforth and proposed a similar event in the Summer. Brains quickly suggested that it could possibly be arranged in tandem with the Bowls Day. This suggestion was warmly received and but will be subject to confirmation by the Laird upon his return from exile.

* The Chair proposed that we turn our thoughts to the Christmas party even though we are 9 months away from the momentous event. He was congratulated for his forward thinking and attention to detail but no further action was taken.

* It was decided that the draw for the Chairmanship Quaich be organised next week.

* The Geezers cards have not been in use for several weeks and this is evident in the resultant drop in revenue, which will no doubt have a knock on effect with regard to expenditure on the Christmas party and away days. The Rabbi has made a fresh set of cards which are good to go, so it was decided that they will make an appearance next week.

* There were expressions of sympathy for the Cardinal and Falcon who are both under the weather at the moment and it is hoped that they will make a speedy recovery and rejoin the fraternity promptly.

The Hon. Sec. apologised in advance for his absence next week, since he will be in Lanzarote with Mrs. Findlay, enjoying a well deserved rest from the onerous duties of detailed and unbiased reporting.

The meeting closed at 1.20.

BURT E. KWOK ( Hon. Sec.)